Therapy in the digital age: Why sharing our stories matters more than ever.

Written by Thomas Giardini, MHC-LP
CoreStory Clinician
[Click here to read more about him]

 
Technology is increasingly present and unavoidable in our lives. As a therapist, I find myself regularly thinking about the impact of technologies—some potential, and some already here—on how we live and engage with one another in an increasingly digital world. For example, it is now common for people to meet with therapists over chat and text lines through providers that primarily rely on textual exchange as the medium for “listening” and intervention. Moving a step further from embodiment, there are a growing number of platforms that allow users to engage in or supplement therapy through automated conversations with artificial intelligence.  

To me, the experience of partnering with a person in talk therapy to listen and explore a person’s life stories is founded in genuineness, acceptance, and empathy. The implications of nonhuman or technologically mediated treatment offer a dizzying array of opportunities and challenges. As you consider whether now may be the right time to begin or perhaps resume therapy, I encourage you to keep in mind three beneficial aspects of exploring your story (whether in person or across virtual space) with a human therapist:

 1. Building patience

Therapy functions in contrast to a world focused on problem-solving and immediate gratification. It encourages us to slow down and take stock of the details that form our personal narratives. Talking to a therapist offers an enduring venue in which to bring understanding to the various complexities of your life, and to generally put words to your journey. By engaging in a weekly protected process, we become accustomed to the benefits of exercising patience toward ourselves and our growth.

2. Embracing presence

A therapist provides a special kind of listening–one that empowers us to discover ourselves in the presence of others. Emerging from a relationship between a listening  therapist and person sharing stories of their life is a safe, positive sense of individual and shared presence. The development of therapeutic rapport provides a social context for transformation and invites us to discover our own patterns of independence and interdependence. When we connect with our therapist, we engage in an opportunity to experiment with how we interact and maintain a sense of curiosity and presence in our  lives.

3. Locating intention

It is often the unplanned moments, the unexpected revelations, and the unrehearsed exchanges that bring us closer to breakthroughs and transformation. In therapy, balancing intentionality and improvisation can guide conversation and challenge our assumptions. When working collaboratively within a therapeutic framework, we remain open to unforeseen insights that may arise and consider how our actions (and reactions) can help propel us closer to our goals.

Your stories are valuable. By sharing them in therapy, it is my hope that each person can find solace, develop understanding, and foster growth.

A Pause for Justice

Photo courtesy of @bingandruth 6/3/20

We’re taking a necessary pause from our usual posts to honor George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor (and countless others), and to acknowledge the nationwide anguish ignited by injustice, racism, and violence.

Now more than ever it is time to listen.

To work to understand and validate others’ experiences, particularly those who have been oppressed and marginalized. 

To be open to others’ stories, their truths.

Even if they are difficult to hear. 

Even if they are at odds with preexisting beliefs.

Now is the time to educate and re-evaluate.

To seek allyship by asking those in need what they need. 

To engage despite discomfort.

There are many avenues for action, but one of the most important is to try to find ways to connect and to dialogue with people who are different from you.

We at CoreStory believe that every individual’s story matters and deserves to be heard.

Right now, we hold space for everyone encountering fear, anger, helplessness, and voicelessness.

Don’t hesitate to reach out for support.

Be kind to yourself. Be kind to others.

Blog Series: Talk Therapy When You’re Stuck at Home (Part 1)

Image courtesy of @danielbarretoes

In these strange pandemic times, it feels like things are changing every moment and strangely, at the same time, things seem to never change!  We simply have to roll with it all. This means embracing unfamiliarity for the sake of safety, and talk therapy is no exception. As a result of the need for social distancing, face-to-face counseling is now digital and remote.

Over the next several weeks, we’ll be putting out a series of posts that will outline the full teletherapy experience - what it is, what it isn’t, and how it can benefit you (particularly during the pandemic).

To begin this series, let’s first talk about what teletherapy is, who can use it, and why we’re talking about it.

What is teletherapy?

Teletherapy is a term that refers to counseling services that are provided via the internet or phone. It means you use a computer or phone to have meetings and speak with a therapist--you being in one place (e.g., your home) and your therapist another. You may have only recently begun to hear about this practice due to COVID-19, but it has existed since the 1990’s. We’ll get into much more detail about what the remote therapy process entails in upcoming posts.

Who uses teletherapy?

In the past, the teletherapy option has been aimed at particular demographics such as people who have limited access to services, lack of transportation, or mobility issues. More recently, in response to the necessary transition to remote services due to coronavirus, teletherapy has demonstrated that it can be used by virtually anyone. Most insurance providers will cover telehealth visits. In light of the pandemic health crisis, insurance companies have temporarily modified certain policies to make it easier and more affordable to receive telehealth services. It is always a good idea to call and double check with your plan.

Why might you use teletherapy?

You may have noticed how online / telephone therapy has become an unusually hot topic due to the public health crisis. The uptick makes sense as the quarantine has forced many in-person services to shut down, or be delivered remotely when possible. What this means for you is that if you were previously in therapy, it doesn’t have to end. You now have the option to transition to teletherapy. Similarly, whether you’ve simply been wanting to try therapy for a while, or the pandemic situation has caused extra stress, teletherapy is a convenient outlet for immediate emotional support.

Have you done therapy using video or phone? What did you think of it? Share your story below.

Keep a lookout for our next post in which we’ll outline practical ways to help you prepare for teletherapy sessions.

Body Talk: 4 Ways To Maintain Body-Positivity

Image courtesy of @gracedchin

In honor of National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, we feel it’s important to open up a discussion about body image.

The way we feel about our bodies can affect so many aspects of life: our self-esteem, relationships, sexual satisfaction, and academic/work performance. Studies have shown that negative body image can create anxiety, depression, eating disorders, and even increase the risk of suicide.

Body Image

What exactly is body image? It could be described as the story we tell ourselves about our bodies. In short, it is our subjective interpretation - and sometimes a skewed one - of what we look like. If this view becomes overly negative, it can escalate into symptoms of body dysmorphia (imagining or exaggerating a physical imperfection that is unnoticeable to others) or even eating disorders.

What can we do to ensure that the story we tell ourselves about our body is a positive, healthy one?

Body Love

Put simply: balance, appreciation, kindness, and perspective are some key elements needed to create a healthy body story.

1. Balance - Feed yourself wholesome, healthy foods, but don’t fear indulging once in a while. Exercise to stay strong and happy, not to look a certain way or to feel like you need to control your body. Eat if you’re hungry, rest if you’re tired.
   

2. Appreciation - Accept your body for what it has given you. Take time to thank it for the all the things it allows you to do. It allows you to move through this world, to communicate with others, to do important work.
   

3. Kindness - You may not always love what you see when you look in the mirror, or when you compare yourself to others’ bodies. Your body, like everyone’s, is perfectly imperfect, constantly changing, and it’s important to be compassionate toward it. Why punish it? It’s your lifetime companion. Seems wise to make friends with it.
   

4. Perspective - Try not to become too focused on your one body. There’s a wide world out there that needs you. If you’re feeling negative or insecure, a great way to break that critical self-talk cycle is to help someone else. You as a person are so much more than just your physical appearance.

What do you tell yourself when you see your body in a mirror? Do you feel that you’re seeing yourself clearly? We’d love to know - leave a comment below.

Further Reading

• https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/screening-tool

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/body-image

• https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/learn/general-information/ten-steps

• https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/body-image-0

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/beauty-sick/201809/4-mantras-improve-body-image

Useful Tips for Starting Therapy

Step 1: Deciding to Begin Therapy

Ready Or Not?

How do you know when to start therapy? You might choose to start therapy for countless reasons. To name a few:

• Feeling isolated, overwhelmed, or stressed

• Having friends or family express concern about your well-being

• Dealing with a major transition (breakup, unemployment, etc.)

• Having trouble organizing or sorting through emotions and thoughts

• Needing a fresh, neutral perspective

• Knowing something isn’t right, but unsure about what to do

• Feeling ready to change and learn more about yourself
  

Basically, there are many factors that might make us want to speak to a professional counselor. There is no right or wrong time per se, but if you find yourself relating to one or more of the listed items above, now might be a good opportunity to start considering it.

Step 2: Finding a Therapist

Window Shopping

Finding a therapist you can authentically relate to and connect with is a priority. The elements of therapy are highly personal, intimate, and vulnerable, so feeling comfortable with your counselor can is crucial for fully engaging in the process. Shop around! Learn about the different types of therapy that exist to see what might work best for you - cognitive-behavioral therapy, psychoanalysis, psychodynamic, the list goes on. (Psychology Today provides solid, comprehensive information on these - read more about them here).

Additionally, some excellent resources for finding a therapist include:

• Psychology Today

• Your insurance company’s website

• Employee Assistance Program

• Referral from friend, family member, or a trusted medical professional

Once you’ve chosen several counselors, call them to set up an initial phone or face-to-face consultation. Prepare some questions to learn more about them, how they operate, and if they have experience with specific issues you might be dealing with.

Step 3: Engaging in Therapy

What Do You Want To Gain?

Different people have different goals and levels of involvement for their therapy experience. Some people go into it as a more short-term, solution-focused approach. They might want to address a particular problem or gain certain coping skills.

At CoreStory, we primarily integrate psychodynamic, psychoanalytic, and narrative therapy orientations. These approaches emphasize the relationship between therapist and client, encourage deeper exploration into thought processes and emotions, and empower clients to tell or rewrite their life stories. Read more about CoreStory’s therapy style and specialties here:

• https://www.corestoryny.com/therapy-style/

• https://www.corestoryny.com/therapy-specialties/
  

A Note on Stigma

It’s important to mention that being in therapy in no way implies that there is something wrong with you. Far from it. In fact, it indicates quite the opposite - that you have the desire and curiosity to understand yourself. As a society, we need to continue the good fight against negative, false assumptions about mental health.

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How do you feel about starting therapy?

If you have already, how did you decide to begin?

Please share your thoughts and experiences with us - comment below.

Further Links

• https://jezebel.com/5703322/how-to-find-a-therapist

• https://www.thecut.com/2017/12/a-beginners-guide-to-finding-the-right-therapist.html

• https://psychcentral.com/blog/talk-the-talk-10-tips-for-starting-therapy/

• https://thriveworks.com/blog/signs-start-therapy/

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/us

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/types-of-therapy

• https://www.corestoryny.com/therapy-style/

• https://www.corestoryny.com/therapy-specialties/