On the verge of 2019, it’s natural to set intentions to become the best versions of ourselves overnight. To remedy all of our bad habits: lose weight, quit smoking, get our finances in order, call our grandparents more, and just generally be...better. Seems reasonable.
Sound like an overwhelming recipe for failure? You bet.
But don’t despair! Here’s a short guide for approaching the new year with hope and pragmatism - without inflating it into something completely unachievable.
Set A Few Realistic Goals
In the middle of making 700 resolutions? How about 1? Don’t overdo it - you’ll be spreading yourself too thin and setting yourself up for inevitable failures. Why not start with a smaller goal that you can see yourself successfully completing? Beginning with a win boosts your confidence and may motivate you to continue making goals. These goals can of course gradually become more challenging, but it helps to start with baby steps.
Validate Your Progress
Remember to acknowledge yourself for what you are able to accomplish. For some reason, it’s easier to get angry at yourself when you fail than to be feel proud of when you succeed. Even if the wins are small, try to pause and congratulate yourself for them.
Prepare for Setbacks
It’s to be expected that you’ll make intentions, follow through, then backslide. It’s okay not to have a straight path to success. You’re a human being, remember? What’s important is to be gentle with yourself on the way there. Be kind to yourself if you trip up. But don’t let it end there, don’t accept defeat. Fall down once, get up twice.
Think Broader
New Year has a certain sexiness to it, making you want to spot treat your life until it’s perfect. But it’s ultimately more useful to reflect on yourself with a zoomed out lens. Meaningful change isn’t just about a new habit or two. Take some time to figure yourself out. How have you been getting in your own way? What are some of the patterns - either positive or negative - that you’ve noticed about yourself? Again, this is a truly prime time to start or get a bit deeper into therapy. Counseling is a hugely valuable resource for cultivating self-awareness and lasting life changes.
The Takeaway
The pressure to constantly improve and be the optimal versions of ourselves is very real. We all feel it, particularly on holidays like New Year’s Eve. But in the scheme of things, January 1st, 2019 is just another day in your life. So are all the January 1sts from here on out. Remain steady on your path, and keep learning and growing, doing what you do.