Written by Stefany Fortin LMSW, CoreStory Clinician
[Click here to read more about her]
Image by Amanda Northrop
2020 in Hindsight: Maybe it doesn’t have to be just a dumpster fire.
One day in mid-March 2020, our lives took an unexpected turn when we were asked to stay home and conduct our usual business in the most unusual way. Our social and professional stories collapsed into a “curve-flattened” version of themselves where some of our senses became over-used (the burn in your eyes after a day of Zoom meetings), while others lost their usual stimulation (remember hugging?).
What we first thought off as a brief, acute situation, has turned into a chronic, open-ended “new normal” on top of which lies the anticipation of a vaccine, and the unrelenting quest for social justice in our country. Meanwhile, some of us have been expected to maintain our same level of productivity at work, and the burden of childcare has fallen on women, who have been quitting the workforce by thousands to hold their families together (https://www.nytimes.com/2020/09/26/world/covid-women-childcare-equality.html). The mix of anxiety, fear, anger, grief, boredom, and loneliness experienced on a daily basis has made for a confusing experience where being overwhelmed and underwhelmed at the very same time is now a daily experience.
How can therapy help me deal with uncertainty?
Therapy won’t take away uncertainty, but it is likely to help you expand your ability to tell your story amidst uncertainty and better tolerate the complexities of life. In other words, by freeing some space in your schedule to pause and reflect on how this unprecedented time has impacted you, you are also freeing some space within yourself to experience and get better acquainted with your feelings.
Start with identifying, then naming, and eventually weaving together your feelings at any given moment into a coherent set of stories can provide a deep sense of purpose and connection to yourself and others. By welcoming feelings that would otherwise be dismissed or avoided, you get to experience tolerating everyday discomfort and by the same occasion gain confidence in your ability to handle your emotions in whatever shape or form they show up. The time, energy, and space you reclaim by engaging in your stories can then be used to create authentic change, this time on your own terms.