A Pause for Justice

 
Photo courtesy of @bingandruth 6/3/20

Photo courtesy of @bingandruth 6/3/20

 

We’re taking a necessary pause from our usual posts to honor George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor (and countless others), and to acknowledge the nationwide anguish ignited by injustice, racism, and violence.

Now more than ever it is time to listen.

To work to understand and validate others’ experiences, particularly those who have been oppressed and marginalized. 

To be open to others’ stories, their truths.

Even if they are difficult to hear. 

Even if they are at odds with preexisting beliefs.

Now is the time to educate and re-evaluate.

To seek allyship by asking those in need what they need. 

To engage despite discomfort.

There are many avenues for action, but one of the most important is to try to find ways to connect and to dialogue with people who are different from you.

We at CoreStory believe that every individual’s story matters and deserves to be heard.

Right now, we hold space for everyone encountering fear, anger, helplessness, and voicelessness.

Don’t hesitate to reach out for support.

Be kind to yourself. Be kind to others.

Blog Series: Talk Therapy When You’re Stuck at Home (Part 1)

 
Image courtesy of @danielbarretoes

Image courtesy of @danielbarretoes

 

In these strange pandemic times, it feels like things are changing every moment and strangely, at the same time, things seem to never change!  We simply have to roll with it all. This means embracing unfamiliarity for the sake of safety, and talk therapy is no exception. As a result of the need for social distancing, face-to-face counseling is now digital and remote.

Over the next several weeks, we’ll be putting out a series of posts that will outline the full teletherapy experience - what it is, what it isn’t, and how it can benefit you (particularly during the pandemic).

To begin this series, let’s first talk about what teletherapy is, who can use it, and why we’re talking about it.

What is teletherapy?

Teletherapy is a term that refers to counseling services that are provided via the internet or phone. It means you use a computer or phone to have meetings and speak with a therapist--you being in one place (e.g., your home) and your therapist another. You may have only recently begun to hear about this practice due to COVID-19, but it has existed since the 1990’s. We’ll get into much more detail about what the remote therapy process entails in upcoming posts.

Who uses teletherapy?

In the past, the teletherapy option has been aimed at particular demographics such as people who have limited access to services, lack of transportation, or mobility issues. More recently, in response to the necessary transition to remote services due to coronavirus, teletherapy has demonstrated that it can be used by virtually anyone. Most insurance providers will cover telehealth visits. In light of the pandemic health crisis, insurance companies have temporarily modified certain policies to make it easier and more affordable to receive telehealth services. It is always a good idea to call and double check with your plan.

Why might you use teletherapy?

You may have noticed how online / telephone therapy has become an unusually hot topic due to the public health crisis. The uptick makes sense as the quarantine has forced many in-person services to shut down, or be delivered remotely when possible. What this means for you is that if you were previously in therapy, it doesn’t have to end. You now have the option to transition to teletherapy. Similarly, whether you’ve simply been wanting to try therapy for a while, or the pandemic situation has caused extra stress, teletherapy is a convenient outlet for immediate emotional support.

 

Have you done therapy using video or phone? What did you think of it? Share your story below.

 

Keep a lookout for our next post in which we’ll outline practical ways to help you prepare for teletherapy sessions.

Holidays: A Time to Reflect On Our Past, Present, and Future Stories

 
 

Unlike Ebenezer Scrooge, we aren’t forced to reflect on our past, present, and future at the end of the year. But maybe we ought to do it voluntarily for our own growth.

At the end of the year, the dominant story is often that we need to be happy, we need to look forward and set goals, and we need to be other-focused. Disputing these dominant stories, it is important to pay attention to a few things that may reflect a more authentic experience for many.

It’s Okay Not To Be Happy

There is a certain cheer that feels attached to holiday time. It is important to recognize that this time of year is not exclusively joyful, and can unearth pain around relationships, family, and self-worth. The holidays are an opportunity to take stock of our story, think about who we are, and where we’re headed in our lives. It can be a positive exercise to use our past challenges as lessons to inform what comes next. In turn, this helps us become more intentional and present in our day-to-day. At the same time, this process can be difficult and dredge up a lot, so allow yourself to honestly feel what you feel. Even if it’s less than cheerful.

It’s Okay To Look Back

Reflection keeps us accountable, keeps us learning, and keeps us pointed towards bettering ourselves. It is common to get swept up in life’s forward-marching pace without pausing. Yet, we would be remiss to endlessly move forward without stopping or turning around once in a while. There is much to be gained by examining our journey. Do you feel like you’re generally getting closer to your what you envision for yourself? Have you gotten a bit distracted or had to put some things on hold? Have you found that your goals have changed?

It’s Okay To Focus On Yourself

The holidays are known to be an other-oriented time, centered around giving gifts or acts of service. Still, during these unique, reflective times, it’s important to remember yourself. How you have grown and what you have accomplished. Try to let unmet goals drive you forward with aspiration rather than regret. Be kind to yourself as you incorporate who you were with who you are now and who you’re becoming. Remember that it’s all part of your unique and evolving story.

What comes up for you when you reflect on the past year? Tell us about it in the comments below.

Trauma Informed Storytelling: Insights from CoreStory clinician Kate Blemler

 
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An area of focus I find to be incredibly important is in working with and unpacking trauma. Trauma is stored in our minds and bodies and heavily impacts how we view ourselves and how we navigate the world. In telling the stories of our traumas, we are able to see our experience from multiple perspectives and change the way it impacts our lives.


Trauma can be big or small. It occurs after exposure to distressing situations of all shapes and sizes -- such as everyday micro-agressions, loss, abuse, a chaotic environment, and systemic injustices. Traumatic experiences occur from early childhood developmental stages to adulthood and vary as broadly as the repeated distress felt by a preschooler during drop off from their caregiver, to repeated acute sexual abuse.


Everyone has experienced some form of trauma in their lifetime. And when faced with unprocessed trauma, an individual’s sense of self, sense of others, and beliefs about the world are often upended. This disruption impacts our securities, attachments, and overall sense of hope. Trauma unprocessed can take away our sense of power and safety — our autonomy can feel threatened and our identity questioned. The majority of individuals impacted by trauma are those who are not innately in positions of power.  Giving those who feel powerless voice by telling stories can recapture a sense of authorship and self-direction and can ultimately lead to improvements in well-being.  


The effects of trauma are both psychological and physical, and symptoms often persist long after the initial trauma occurs. If left unaddressed, traumas accumulate and affect emotional wellbeing. Both can be addressed by sharing stories about it in therapy.


The work of therapy is to process trauma in a safe space in order to change the way it impacts our lives. This idea of giving voice to traumatic experiences illustrates the power of narrative in authoring our own stories. By using the safety of a psychotherapy setting to revisit the trauma, we can start rewriting our position as victim to that of survivor. We can use the therapy space to begin validating our experience and in turn empowering ourselves. In retelling our stories through a trauma-focused lens, we begin the healing process by redeveloping our sense of self.


New Clinician Spotlight: Kate Blemler

 
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We warmly welcome Kate Blemler, MHC-LP to our clinical team!

A graduate of Fordham University’s mental health counseling masters program, Kate has worked as a therapist in a variety of psychological settings. Her undergraduate background is in creative writing and film - she has a deep appreciation for narrative.

She looks forward to helping others explore their stories.

Read her full bio here.

We've Moved!

CoreStory’s office has just relocated to a new building
on East 30th street - suite 503 -
tucked between Kips Bay and Murray Hill.

Our new waiting area and four clinician offices are set up to be
light-filled, calm, safe, and comfortable places for our clients.

Have a look inside our new space!

Mental Health Awareness Month

 
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What Is It?

Since 1949, May has been mental health awareness month. For 70 years now, it has served served as an annual reminder to increase understanding of mental health issues and to take down stigma. The fact that 1 in 5 people will be affected by mental illness in their lifetime emphasizes the need for a movement like this.

What’s The Goal?

Mental Health America and NAMI have headed up this effort to educate the public, build empathy, and clear the path for people to connect with the therapeutic help they might need. Over the years, these organizations have highlighted various issues surrounding mental health including self-care, physical wellness, etc.

Mental health awareness month tackles negative associations with mental health treatment as well as other obstacles preventing people from seeking help such as cost, access to resources, and time. It provides outlets to educate yourself/others on these issues, advocate for policies supporting mental health, and NAMI even provides a link to a Cure Stigma quiz to help us see how much we may or may not fall victim to negative stereotypes around mental illness.

Why Is It Important?

Mental health awareness month helps to universalize mental health issues and their treatments. Having this conversation helps us understand that these types of struggles are part of many of our stories. These struggles are nothing to feel shame about, but perhaps to view as something that bonds us together as human beings. What underlies mental health month - which should not be limited to one month, we might add - is the reminder that everyone is supported and not alone.

How do you feel about mental health month? Comment below.

Further Reading

Body Talk: 4 Ways To Maintain Body-Positivity

Image courtesy of @gracedchin

Image courtesy of @gracedchin

In honor of National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, we feel it’s important to open up a discussion about body image.

The way we feel about our bodies can affect so many aspects of life: our self-esteem, relationships, sexual satisfaction, and academic/work performance. Studies have shown that negative body image can create anxiety, depression, eating disorders, and even increase the risk of suicide.

Body Image

What exactly is body image? It could be described as the story we tell ourselves about our bodies. In short, it is our subjective interpretation - and sometimes a skewed one - of what we look like. If this view becomes overly negative, it can escalate into symptoms of body dysmorphia (imagining or exaggerating a physical imperfection that is unnoticeable to others) or even eating disorders.

What can we do to ensure that the story we tell ourselves about our body is a positive, healthy one?

Body Love

Put simply: balance, appreciation, kindness, and perspective are some key elements needed to create a healthy body story.

  1. Balance - Feed yourself wholesome, healthy foods, but don’t fear indulging once in a while. Exercise to stay strong and happy, not to look a certain way or to feel like you need to control your body. Eat if you’re hungry, rest if you’re tired.

  2. Appreciation - Accept your body for what it has given you. Take time to thank it for the all the things it allows you to do. It allows you to move through this world, to communicate with others, to do important work.

  3. Kindness - You may not always love what you see when you look in the mirror, or when you compare yourself to others’ bodies. Your body, like everyone’s, is perfectly imperfect, constantly changing, and it’s important to be compassionate toward it. Why punish it? It’s your lifetime companion. Seems wise to make friends with it.

  4. Perspective - Try not to become too focused on your one body. There’s a wide world out there that needs you. If you’re feeling negative or insecure, a great way to break that critical self-talk cycle is to help someone else. You as a person are so much more than just your physical appearance.

What do you tell yourself when you see your body in a mirror? Do you feel that you’re seeing yourself clearly? We’d love to know - leave a comment below.

Further Reading

Gut Feelings: The Connection Between Digestive Health and Mental Health

Image via Consumer Reports

Body + Brain, Together Forever

Over the past decade, diet, nutrition, and general health have become particularly hot topics. Health encompasses both our emotional and physical well-being, so it shouldn’t surprise you that they’re intimately connected.

The Human Microbiome

Emergent research has pointed more and more to the gut-brain linkage. Many studies have begun highlighting the role of inflammation and the importance of maintaining a balanced microbiome.

What is a microbiome, you ask? It is defined as the collective genomes of the microbes (composed of bacteria, bacteriophage, fungi, protozoa and viruses) that live inside and on the human body.

Gut Health’s Relationship to Mental Health

The body reacts to stress in two primary ways - hormonally and immunologically.

Hormones

We know now that chronic stress can create elevated levels of the stress hormone cortisol, leading to physical and emotional issues such as anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, headaches, as well as gut issues. But this is only half the story.

The Immune System

The other half is that our immune system is also affected by stress. Our immune system responds to stress like it’s an infection, creating inflammation to counteract it. This system is highly effective at protecting our bodies from pathogens, but if the inflammatory response persists for too long, it can create the same sorts of physical and emotional issues as with elevated cortisol levels.

Tips For A Healthy Gut

Diet

Studies suggest that to encourage a healthy microbiome, it’s best to:

  • Limit refined, processed, or saturated fat ingredients (e.g. white sugar, white flour, meat/dairy fats).

  • Incorporate fermented foods (e.g. active culture yogurt, kefir, pickles, sauerkraut, miso, tempeh, or kimchi).

  • Include fiber-rich foods (e.g. whole grains, legumes, whole fruits and vegetables).

  • Look into a low FODMAP diet.

Probiotics

  • Disclaimer: despite much hype, probiotics on their own are not currently FDA regulated or reliably proven to be effective in alleviating symptoms of mental issues such as anxiety or depression. However, research suggests that they are helpful when used in concordance with psychiatric medication. The question remains: can probiotics alone (without pharmaceutical medications) alleviate these symptoms? We’ll have to wait and see what future studies tell us. In the meantime, if they work for you, run with it.

Take Care

  • Keep stress levels to a minimum.

  • Stay hydrated.

  • Get proper sleep.

  • Exercise, do yoga, meditate, or try diaphragmatic breathing exercises.

The Takeaway

As always, it’s important to always be tuned in to your body and emotions. If things feel out of whack - you’re not sleeping well, feeling anxious/depressed/exhausted, having digestive problems - then perhaps it’s time to change something. The solution will look different from person to person; the balance of our bodies and minds is unique to us. But don’t underestimate the power of nutrition. We can harness that power to help keep us well, too. Joy Yang, a National Institute of Health microbiome researcher said it best:

“We have learned that the bacteria living in and on us are not invaders but are beneficial colonizers. The hope is that, as research progresses, we will learn how to care for our microscopic colonizers so that they, in turn, can care for our health.”

What do you eat that makes you feel good, happy, and healthy? Leave a comment below!

Further Links

2019: Resolution Revolution

On the verge of 2019, it’s natural to set intentions to become the best versions of ourselves overnight. To remedy all of our bad habits: lose weight, quit smoking, get our finances in order, call our grandparents more, and just generally be...better. Seems reasonable.

Sound like an overwhelming recipe for failure? You bet.

But don’t despair! Here’s a short guide for approaching the new year with hope and pragmatism - without inflating it into something completely unachievable.

Set A Few Realistic Goals

In the middle of making 700 resolutions? How about 1? Don’t overdo it - you’ll be spreading yourself too thin and setting yourself up for inevitable failures. Why not start with a smaller goal that you can see yourself successfully completing? Beginning with a win boosts your confidence and may motivate you to continue making goals. These goals can of course gradually become more challenging, but it helps to start with baby steps.

Validate Your Progress

Remember to acknowledge yourself for what you are able to accomplish. For some reason, it’s easier to get angry at yourself when you fail than to be feel proud of when you succeed. Even if the wins are small, try to pause and congratulate yourself for them.

Prepare for Setbacks

It’s to be expected that you’ll make intentions, follow through, then backslide. It’s okay not to have a straight path to success. You’re a human being, remember? What’s important is to be gentle with yourself on the way there. Be kind to yourself if you trip up. But don’t let it end there, don’t accept defeat. Fall down once, get up twice.

Think Broader

New Year has a certain sexiness to it, making you want to spot treat your life until it’s perfect. But it’s ultimately more useful to reflect on yourself with a zoomed out lens. Meaningful change isn’t just about a new habit or two. Take some time to figure yourself out. How have you been getting in your own way? What are some of the patterns - either positive or negative - that you’ve noticed about yourself? Again, this is a truly prime time to start or get a bit deeper into therapy. Counseling is a hugely valuable resource for cultivating self-awareness and lasting life changes.

The Takeaway

The pressure to constantly improve and be the optimal versions of ourselves is very real. We all feel it, particularly on holidays like New Year’s Eve. But in the scheme of things, January 1st, 2019 is just another day in your life. So are all the January 1sts from here on out. Remain steady on your path, and keep learning and growing, doing what you do.

Pre-New Year's Challenge: Reflect Without Regret

New Year, New Fear

Do you find that the new year makes you think about a lot of old stuff? In a sometimes not so positive light?

Well, you’re not alone.

Times of reflection, like New Year’s Eve, can intensify any tendencies you already have to compare yourself to others, or to focus on the things you should-have-would-have-could-have accomplished.

The Shame Game

Classic New Years regrets typically revolve around the following:

  • Health and weight loss

  • Relationships

  • Career success

  • Financial issues and debt

  • Forming or breaking habits

And all of these can be further worsened by seasonal winter blues - icing on the cake.

It’s true that society does us few favors by pushing conventional success and encouraging constant comparison to others.

So as the year turns over, how do we escape that shame spiral of feeling like we’re not enough?

Be Real and Share Your Feels

In spite of everyone’s sparkly, celebratory appearance on this holiday, chances are they’re all feeling a bit insecure about themselves and their annual accomplishments.

It’s okay to be honest with yourself about what you’re feeling, even if it’s less than joyous. It’s especially important to take care of yourself right now. Find those you feel close to and share with them.

Some more ideas for how to stay honest and connected on New Year’s:

  • Write in a journal

  • Talk to your closest friends or family

  • Have a quiet night in to think a little

  • Don’t push yourself to fake feelings of celebration or happiness

  • Leave the party a little early

  • Focus on your own life without comparing yourself to others

A Prime Time for Therapy

Sometimes, the tough feelings brought on by the holidays demand more than just the ear of a friend or a family member. The New Year is a great opportunity to begin therapy or to schedule an extra session with your counselor. Therapists are a wonderful sounding board for helping you sort out your emotions, ground you, and to help you see things a bit more clearly. Our approach at CoreStory is strongly based in narrative therapy. This method has you look at your life as a story you are writing. The New Year is an ideal time to take stock of your life story and to think about how you’d like to see it progress.

The Takeaway

New Year’s can be a surprisingly overwhelming occasion, sometimes bringing on waves of insecurity and failure. Try to think of this moment as an opportunity to self-reflect without comparing yourself to others. Focus on yourself right now regardless of what others are doing or have accomplished. Seek out the counsel of those you love and trust, whether it’s a friend or a therapist. Remember, your life is your own and if you want to change it, you certainly can! But try to be patient and gentle with yourself while you’re in process - these things take time.

4 Ways to Prepare for Upcoming Holiday Stress

Photo courtesy of

The Joy and Pain of Holidays

What do you typically associate with holiday time? These are some classic holiday highlights:

  • Traveling homeward

  • Spending time at home

  • Being together with family

  • Breaking up the everyday routine

  • Eating and drinking

  • Exchanging gifts

Those very same things that some people love about the holidays are triggers for others. Let’s look at that list again, but from an alternative perspective.

  • Navigating crowded, long journeys by plane/train/automobile

  • Being stuck inside for days and getting cabin fever

  • Having to interact with challenging relatives and speak about uncomfortable, personal topics (e.g. lifestyle, politics)

  • Being thrown off the usual schedule (e.g. exercise regimen, wake/sleep hours)

  • Being constantly tempted to overindulge / dealing with relatives who may or may not be able to drink alcohol responsibly

  • Feeling pressured to overspend on presents in order to please others

It’s important to understand that the holidays can be a particularly difficult time. According to an American Psychological Association survey in 2017, 38% of individuals reported their stress level increased during the holiday season. Participants listed the top stressors: lack of time, lack of money, commercialism, the pressures of gift-giving, and family gatherings.

With this in mind, how can we protect ourselves, and survive - perhaps even enjoy - the winter festivities?

4 Tips for Coping with Holiday Stress

  1. Cultivate patience - It’s inevitable that some aspect of the holidays will test your nerves. Whether it’s an endless airport line or an uncle who launches into a tirade about the midterm elections, try to breathe and stay grounded. This is a perfect opportunity to practice staying calm. Remember that you’ll - likely - only be in this situation a few times a year. Do whatever helps you get through the trying moments - use humor, take a break to observe rather than participate, but most of all breathe and remember that this too shall pass.

  2. Take space - Togetherness is a lovely thing, but it can be exhausting and stifling. If you find yourself getting overwhelmed or worked up being around people, carve out a few moments for yourself. Subtly disappear for a few minutes in a quiet room (bathrooms are fantastic retreats) or take a quick walk outside. Constantly socializing and being “on” can be surprisingly draining. Taking some solo time, even if it’s brief, is a great method to reset.

  3. Maintain boundaries - Bringing people with diverse personalities and varying opinions into close quarters can be tricky. Ever been sitting next to a relative you barely know (or know all too well) when they start to question your life choices, lecture you about politics, or have one too many drinks and start getting rowdy? These common holiday nightmare scenarios are recipes for making people feel anxious, defensive, and trapped. To combat them, remember that you still have control over these interactions. It’s more than acceptable to say, “Hey, I don’t really feel comfortable talking about this anymore right now.” If that still doesn’t get your point across, there’s nothing wrong with literally stepping away for a while. Drawing boundaries is a key part of holiday self-care. [Pro tip: If you’re currently seeing a therapist, it’s never a bad idea to schedule an appointment right after the holiday so you’ll have an opportunity to process it].

  4. Be moderate - Whether it’s deciding not to have seconds of all 20 pies on the table, or placing a dollar limit on gifts, it’s important to employ moderation. The holidays are often a display of excess and overabundance. It can be hard to control yourself around heaps of food and alcohol, whether that translates to restriction or overindulgence. Sometimes there is pressure to empty your wallet on material items to prove your generosity and love to others. There’s no need be extreme in any of these respects. Set realistic, healthy expectations for yourself.


The Takeaway

At their core, holidays are about feeling comforted, relaxed, loved, and minimally stressed. Try to keep focused on what’s truly important about the upcoming festivities, exercise self-care, and enjoy what you can of the next few months. Everyone experiences the holidays differently, so around this time of year, please remember to be kind / check in with people you care about, including yourself.

Useful Tips for Starting Therapy

 
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Step 1: Deciding to Begin Therapy

Ready Or Not?

How do you know when to start therapy? You might choose to start therapy for countless reasons. To name a few:

  • Feeling isolated, overwhelmed, or stressed

  • Having friends or family express concern about your well-being

  • Dealing with a major transition (breakup, unemployment, etc.)

  • Having trouble organizing or sorting through emotions and thoughts

  • Needing a fresh, neutral perspective

  • Knowing something isn’t right, but unsure about what to do

  • Feeling ready to change and learn more about yourself

Basically, there are many factors that might make us want to speak to a professional counselor. There is no right or wrong time per se, but if you find yourself relating to one or more of the listed items above, now might be a good opportunity to start considering it.

Step 2: Finding a Therapist

Window Shopping

Finding a therapist you can authentically relate to and connect with is a priority. The elements of therapy are highly personal, intimate, and vulnerable, so feeling comfortable with your counselor can is crucial for fully engaging in the process. Shop around! Learn about the different types of therapy that exist to see what might work best for you - cognitive-behavioral therapy, psychoanalysis, psychodynamic, the list goes on. (Psychology Today provides solid, comprehensive information on these - read more about them here).

Additionally, some excellent resources for finding a therapist include:

  • Psychology Today

  • Your insurance company’s website

  • Employee Assistance Program

  • Referral from friend, family member, or a trusted medical professional

Once you’ve chosen several counselors, call them to set up an initial phone or face-to-face consultation. Prepare some questions to learn more about them, how they operate, and if they have experience with specific issues you might be dealing with.

Step 3: Engaging in Therapy

What Do You Want To Gain?

Different people have different goals and levels of involvement for their therapy experience. Some people go into it as a more short-term, solution-focused approach. They might want to address a particular problem or gain certain coping skills.

At CoreStory, we primarily integrate psychodynamic, psychoanalytic, and narrative therapy orientations. These approaches emphasize the relationship between therapist and client, encourage deeper exploration into thought processes and emotions, and empower clients to tell or rewrite their life stories. Read more about CoreStory’s therapy style and specialties here:

A Note on Stigma

It’s important to mention that being in therapy in no way implies that there is something wrong with you. Far from it. In fact, it indicates quite the opposite - that you have the desire and curiosity to understand yourself. As a society, we need to continue the good fight against negative, false assumptions about mental health.

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How do you feel about starting therapy?

If you have already, how did you decide to begin?

Please share your thoughts and experiences with us - comment below.

Further Links

5 Physical Signs of Depression

 
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Depression: Darkness Visible

This week, we’re putting the spotlight on another of the most prevalent mental health issues: depression. According to the World Health Organization, as of 2018 depression affects more than 300 million people worldwide. Hallmarks of depression include loss of interest in activities, low energy/mood, appetite and sleep disruption, poor concentration, feelings of low self-worth, etc. It can occur alongside other issues including substance abuse and anxiety. Depression is a particularly high risk issue because not only does it impair everyday functioning, at its worst it can escalate to suicide.

5 Lesser-Known Physical Symptoms of Depression

“The madness of depression is, generally speaking, the antithesis of violence. It is a storm indeed, but a storm of murk. Soon evident are the slowed-down responses, near paralysis, psychic energy throttled back close to zero. Ultimately, the body is affected and feels sapped, drained.”

William Styron, Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness (1990)


This excerpt is from author William Styron’s memoir. In it he chronicles his own experience of what depression feels like, mentally and physically. Many people consider depression to be a disease of the mind while forgetting the toll it can take on the body. The following are some of the bodily manifestations of depression:

  1. Headaches - While not always a direct cause of depression, migraines and tension headaches have certainly been associated with it.

  2. Chronic pain - Mood influences sensory experiences, pain in particular. If you find that you have mysterious aches/pains, check in with your emotional state. There may indeed be a connection.

  3. Fatigue - Regardless of your level of physical activity, depression can make you feel completely sapped of energy. Sometimes, simply climbing a flight of stairs can feel exhausting.

  4. Skin issues - Depression can cause extra stress, resulting in increased levels of the stress hormone cortisol. This can cause skin issues or aggravate pre-existing skin problems, particularly if you’re prone to rashes or breakouts.

  5. Weight changes - Depression is also associated with fluctuations in appetite. This can manifest in becoming ravenously hungry, completely apathetic towards food (and sometimes self-care in general), or anywhere in between. It varies from case to case.

The Takeaway

As with anxiety, many of the physical symptoms that accompany depression can be quite general. These signs may be trying to point you to an emotional issue like depression, or a medical condition such as hypothyroidism (a hormonal condition that can mimic the symptoms of depression).

The bottom line is that physical symptoms are trying to bring your attention to something. It is important to listen to what your body and mind are telling you. What you find might surprise you and help you learn about yourself.

How often do you check in with yourself, body or mind? Do any of these physical symptoms resonate with you?

Please share with us - like or leave a comment below!

Further Links

6 Physical Symptoms of Anxiety

6 Physical Symptoms of Anxiety

 
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Body Talk

Our bodies are sensitive systems that are constantly communicating with us. You’re walking through a field of flowers in springtime and start uncontrollably sneezing - that’s your body telling you it’s allergic to pollen. You eat a chicken sandwich that you found sitting in the backseat of your car and start feeling nauseous - that’s your stomach rejecting tainted food and telling you you’re about to pay handsomely for a questionable decision.

These examples involve symptoms that clearly point to physical causes. It’s common to assume that a physical symptom means that the cause is also physical in nature. But what about mysterious, general physical problems where the cause is harder to determine? Like headaches, muscle tension, or a suddenly racing heart? In these cases, our bodies are again trying to tell us something, but the symptoms are harder to decode.


How often do we consider that these symptoms could be manifestations of emotions, not just the body?

Anxiety: A Monster with Many Faces

Anxiety is one of the most prevalent mental health issues today. As of 2018, The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that 31.1% of adults in the United States will experience an anxiety disorder at some point in their lives. The Anxiety and Depression Association of America have documented that people with anxiety disorders are 3 to 5 times more likely to go to the doctor. These statistics show us that anxiety is not only incredibly common, but that it affects people’s mind and body. This is why it is so important to learn to recognize some of the physical symptoms of anxiety.

6 Bodily Symptoms of Anxiety

Anxiety can show itself in many ways, so we’ve highlighted some of the most common ones.

  1. Muscle Tension - Particular areas of your body might be quite tense or tight. The neck, back, chest, or jaw are often affected.

  2. Repetitive Nervous Habits - Restless leg shaking, lip/cheek chewing, skin picking, nail biting, or teeth grinding are classic signs of anxiety.

  3. Digestive Issues - Gastrointestinal troubles are strong clues, ranging from stomachaches to constipation/diarrhea, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, abdominal cramps, nausea, or increased frequency of using the bathroom.

  4. Sleep Disruptions - Anxiety can make you feel keyed-up, or wired to the point of insomnia, but it can also exhaust you with fatigue. Additionally, it can cause vivid nightmares, further interrupting restful sleep.

  5. Racing Heart - A common symptom of panic disorder is elevated heart rate. It often brings with it dizziness, shortness of breath or low blood pressure.

  6. Increased Body Temperature - Feeling hot, having a flushed appearance, and sweating are also red flags of anxiety.

The Takeaway

This list is by no means exhaustive, but might prove helpful in identifying the root of physical discomfort. It is worth noting that mental health issues can occur independently of or in addition to physical medical conditions. Thus, it is important to be evaluated by both a medical professional as well as a therapist.

Recognizing these signs can help you get a handle on feeling better. Developing coping skills such as breathing exercises, physical activity, meditation, working with a therapist, and in some instances medication, are just several of many methods to work with these symptoms. Understanding what you are experiencing is an important first step in alleviating the pain of anxiety.

What helps you when you feel anxious? If something helps you, it might help someone else dealing with the same. Please share with us - leave a comment!

Further Reading

Courage to Speak: The Survivor’s Story

This past week was a painful, triggering one for survivors of sexual assault. The news cycle has been on fire since the hearing in which Christine Blasey Ford appeared before the Senate Judiciary Committee to testify against Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh whom she says sexually assaulted her when they were in high school. After her vulnerable testimony, Kavanaugh responded by forcefully denying these allegations. After it was announced that republican Senator Jeff Flake voted in favor of Kavanaugh, two female survivors of sexual assault confronted him in an elevator as he tried to leave. They held the elevator doors open, gave emotional accounts of their own experiences as victims, and asked him how he could send the message that perpetrators still win in spite of their victim’s story. This incident prompted Flake to waver on his stance; he has since asked for a week long FBI investigation of the outstanding allegations against Kavanaugh before he guarantees his nomination.

To be clear, this post is not about politics. It is about human trauma and survivorship. The core issue here is about victims feeling brave enough, supported enough to speak their truth and come forward with it. Ford’s voice is one of a huge chorus of women - ultimately of people - bringing the issue of sexual assault to light. Her testimony, as well as the women who spoke to Senator Flake, highlights the importance of survivors telling their stories. It encourages a conversation about those who come forward to share their difficult experiences, and about the way others choose to respond to these stories.

Therapy was a key factor that helped Ford to vocalize what happened to her, and to eventually come forward. Many news articles covering the hearing pointed out that it was during a couples counseling session in 2012 that she was first able to voice her experience.

Therapy provides an empathic, supportive atmosphere to disclose personal experiences, trauma included. Narrative therapy is particularly curative when acknowledging and processing traumas. It empowers clients to be their own authors - to speak their stories, and even rewrite them.

If we are to help others transform victimhood into survivorship, we must support, listen, and acknowledge the reality of these painful stories.

“There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside of you”
- Maya Angelou, author, poet, mother, sexual assault survivor

Further resources:

Summer’s Over? Back to Real Life.

Handling Autumn Anxiety

How do you feel when your calendar switches over to September 1st? Nervous as responsibilities creep back in? Wistful to have more time to accomplish your warm-weather plans?

If you’ve felt this seasonal anxiety before, you’re certainly not alone.

In 2005, Ginny Scully, a therapist from Wales, invented the term “autumn anxiety” to describe the feelings of anticipation and nervousness that accompany August’s shift into September. Although autumn anxiety is not classified as a clinical issue like Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), it’s certainly real. The phenomenon is brought on by a number of elements: cooler weather, shorter days, the school year beginning, new social and work-related responsibilities, and less free time in general.

Consider these 4 ways to keep autumn angst in check:

  1. WRITE A NEW CHAPTER - The fall season brings with it transition and newness. Each year, the change of season gives us an opportunity to start over. To write a new story for ourselves - set fresh goals and challenges. Consider everything you’ve gained over the course of the year, let it propel you forward.

  2. TAKE STOCK - Get organized about what you’re doing. What did you do this year so far? What’s changed? What’s the same? What would you like to see for the remainder of the year? Keep in mind what you’ve accomplished so far and be intentional about where you want to go from here.

  3. STAY CONNECTED - It can be all too tempting to stay inside under a blanket through the dark, chilly months. Plan activities with friends to fight depression and isolation. Get together to do cozy fall things. Think: warm drinks, funny movies, crafting, cooking, museums, apple picking.

  4. REFLECT AND TAKE CARE - Fall is the perfect time to introspect. Take time to contemplate, journal, meditate, and be gentle with yourself. Think about how you’ve grown, what you’ve accomplished over the year, and prioritize the things you have yet to follow through on.

Keep in mind that times of transition, seasonal or otherwise, can be ideal for starting therapy. Counseling can be a great help, offering perspective when it comes to understanding yourself, your current story, and your future goals.

Further Links:





     

A Simple Self-Care Method

Last week, we highlighted how tough the transition into autumn can be. Whether you’re entering a new season or not, a main lesson to take away is that taking care of yourself is an essential, year-round practice. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

When you’re starting to feel overwhelmed or burnt out and need some self-care inspiration - FAST - a good place to start is with your immediate senses. Attuning to your body in the present moment is an excellent way to start feeling stronger and more centered.

Here’s a quick exercise that uses your five senses as a way to recharge:

The 5 Senses Exercise

  1. Sight -  What can you look at to relax you? A pretty view of nature outside your window? A funny TV show? Pictures of people you love or places you’ve visited?

  2. Smell - Can you smell any fragrances that help rejuvenate you? Incense? Candles? Clean laundry? Crunchy leaves on a path?

  3. Sound - What sounds put you in a better frame of mind? A favorite album? An audiobook? Silence?

  4. Touch - What touch-oriented sensations make you feel more centered? Your pet’s fur? Dirt in the garden? Cascading water from a hot shower?

  5. Taste - Is there a taste that comforts you? Peppermint gum? Hot cup of tea? Your favorite snack/meal/treat?


This brief technique is just one drop in a sea of self-care activities. There are endless ways to decompress.

How do you do self-care?

Leave us a comment - we’d love to know!

How To Manage News-Related Stress

 

No News Is Good News? 

Keeping up on current events is barely an option in today’s world. Where we once spent a leisurely hour reading the paper over morning coffee, we now are subjected to a round-the-clock flood of breaking headlines. In 2017, clinical psychologist Steven Stosny coined the term “headline stress disorder” to describe the stress response brought on by a constant siege of alerts from news sources, blogs, social media, and alternative facts. The negative power of a headline lies in its ability to make us feel generally disheartened, powerless, or vulnerable. Anyone, regardless of political stance, can feel overwhelmed by the everpresent hurricane of domestic and global events. A new 2018 study by the Pew Research Center revealed that 7 in 10 Americans feel exhausted by the news. 

How can you protect yourself from the endless stream of depressing, frightening events going on around you?

Here are 4 ways to help neutralize headline stress:
 

  1. SET LIMITS - Allow yourself a window of time to read about current events, but cap it off. Think about not starting or ending the day with the news if you find that it riles you up. Periodically disconnect from social media and other news notifications. Consider deleting news or social media platform apps from your phone so you won’t have constant access to them. Turn off news notifications to minimize breaking headline alerts. If friends/coworkers are discussing the latest, don’t feel obligated to engage or share your opinions
     
  2. STAY POSITIVE - Mainstream news tends to skew negative, failing to accurately portray what is happening in society. Try to maintain a balanced perspective by seeking out good news. Sites like www.goodnewsnetwork.org and www.dailygood.org feature articles on a variety of topics including scientific innovation, heroic human acts, and other inspirational stories
     
  3. ACT LOCALLY - Reading about huge global problems is enough to leave you feeling paralyzed. Make realistic goals, stay proactive, and focus on what you can contribute to your city, town, school, family, etc. Sites like www.volunteermatch.org and www.idealist.org are great resources for discovering and connecting with volunteer opportunities near you.
     
  4. TAKE CARE - Above all, stay healthy, happy, and grounded. Eat well, get enough sleep, surround yourself with people who are supportive to you. As basic as this sounds, you’ll be able to manage stress, anxiety, and your own personal boundaries more effectively if you’re feeling balanced.
     

The news is happening around us 24/7, but we can do more than merely consume it and become overwhelmed by it. Stay sane, hopeful, and keep channeling your energy toward what you can do — there’s plenty.

 

Further Links:

Online Counseling: The Future of Therapy?

https://bit.ly/2OLYksI

https://bit.ly/2OLYksI

Thanks to the internet and its infinite apps, we’re able to gratify almost any need in an instant. So much of our day-to-day has become on-demand and platform-based. Curious about someone? Facebook. Hunting for a job? LinkedIn. Need a ride? Uber. Want a date? Tinder. Hungry? Seamless.

But what if you’re looking for therapy?

Telepsychology aims to make counseling easy to access. It simplifies and speeds up the process of finding a therapist. No more going to an office for a weekly appointment. For most platforms, it comes down to a quick sign-up, survey, live chat evaluation, and then via an algorithm, voila! You’re matched with a counselor. Sounds streamlined enough, but inevitably it’s more complex than that. For starters, which platform to choose?

Telepsychology Options At A Glance

Within the past several years, telemedicine has brought with it a wave of new online counseling platforms. These platforms offer a variety of modality options: video conferencing, live chat, audio, and texting. Some charge per session, others offer monthly subscriptions, with varying eligibility for insurance reimbursement. The table below offers a side by side comparison of the most popular recent online counseling services.

 
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Note: The Wirecutter, a New York Times product review company, recently published several informative articles about online counseling [see below for links]. Their team tried several of these services, ultimately choosing AmWell and DrOnDemand as their top two picks. Preliminary research has indicated that video is the preferred modality, likely because it gets as close to an in-person therapeutic interaction as technology allows.

Benefits and Risks

As with any new tool, online counseling comes with a host of positives and negatives.

Pros

  • Highly flexible

  • Eliminates barriers to treatment - ideal for clients who are highly anxious, homebound, disabled, dealing with PTSD e.g. veterans, or living in rural areas

  • Normalizes mental health treatment and decreases stigma 

  • Serves as a great introduction to therapy on the road to longer-term treatment

Cons

  • Hinges on accessibility to / reliability of technology

  • Introduces legal issues (clinicians are geographically bound by their license to practice in a certain state)

  • Brings up ethical issues (client privacy, limitations with crisis intervention)

  • Limitations of technology with regard to establishing an authentic connection

  • May not be ideal for high-risk cases or clients dealing with serious diagnoses

  • Can be more financially driven than care driven - companies compromise services provided to clients, and fail to support / protect clinicians

  • Are often launched by people who come from a tech background, not a mental health background; without enough clinicians on staff, team might not fully grasp the legalities and ethics of HIPAA compliance, geography-based practice limitations, etc.

Teletherapy has already showcased its potential to normalize mental health treatment and to maximize client access to these services. At the same time, its pitfalls are not insignificant and affect both clients and clinicians. For clients in crisis or dealing with severe diagnoses, the digital interface may not provide sufficient support. Depending on the platform, clients are not always required to provide identifying information, making proper crisis intervention very difficult for a therapist to carry out. In this vein, client privacy is an ongoing concern. Platforms are usually HIPAA compliant, text is SSL encrypted, but therapist access to client records and a client’s right to remain entirely anonymous remain gray areas.

Additionally, technology in general creates a certain barrier that may compromise an authentic therapeutic connection. Imagine being in the middle of an intense, emotional video chat with your therapist and all of a sudden the screen freezes or the WiFi cuts out. It’s a tall order to replace the in-person therapeutic relationship; online counseling is doing its best despite the restraints of technology.

The Takeaway on Teletherapy

Therapy doesn’t need to cling to the couch or fear the smartphone’s influence. Mental health treatment has to be able to evolve with the culture. At the same time, online therapy services shouldn’t compromise quality of care, or legal and ethical standards of the field. Teletherapy companies are a delicate combination of revenue-driven business and nuanced, human service. In online counseling's ideal form, protecting practitioners, supporting clients, and honoring the therapeutic process should always come first.

How do you feel about online therapy?

Would you try it? Have you tried it?

Is it the future or just too strange?

Share your thoughts and experiences with us! We’d love to hear from you. 

Leave a comment below.

More Links About Online Counseling